Lately, our household has been a whirlwind, with two teenage daughters tackling final assignments, ISUs, and exam prep. Emotions are running high, and it seems like no one is really listening.

I've been helping my daughters by reviewing their work for flow, grammar, and more. However, I realized they're absorbing maybe a quarter of what I’m saying. This week, my eldest daughter asked me to review a website she created, needing a fresh set of eyes. I asked her to send me the link and, while waiting, started working on some emails. Ten minutes passed, and I hadn’t received anything.

Me: I still haven’t received the link.
Daughter: “I sent it.”
Me: Okay, but I haven’t received it.
Daughter: Mom, you already have it. Just give me a minute. (She was studying math in the other room.)

I continued with my work. Thirty minutes later:

Me: Do you still need me to review your website?
Daughter: Mom, I thought you were already looking at it. (In my head, I’m thinking, WHAT???)

She got up from the dining room table, walked over, took my computer, opened a section in Google I’d never used, and pulled up the site. I looked at her, puzzled, and said, “How was I supposed to know it was there?” She gave me a dirty look and walked away.

Why share this story? Well, it's kinda funny and a great example of what happens when people are stressed or overwhelmed. Everyone experiences stress, and it can really impact communication skills. In this situation, I felt unheard, and she felt I wasn’t listening, even though she omitted some crucial information. I assumed she would email me the link, as she usually does. She assumed I knew she had shared it through Google Sites!

Guess what? This happens far too often at work, at home, and in social situations.

What’s the big deal?

Well, in this situation, I didn’t realize there were so many pages to review, and the delay in getting the link reduced my time to complete the review, causing a delay in submission.

This happens in workplace environments more often than we realize. In my corporate days, I earned the nickname “The Firefighter.” The CEO often called me in when miscommunication caused things to go awry. While it wasn’t officially part of my job, it became a crucial role. I would sit down with the involved parties to clarify what was supposed to happen, identify where communication had broken down, and develop a plan to get things back on track.

Whether at home or in the workplace, miscommunication can lead to significant delays and misunderstandings. It's essential to ensure clear communication, especially during stressful times, to avoid unnecessary complications and maintain smooth operations.

If you could evaluate your current listening skills, would you be willing to invest 10-15 minutes to find out how you’re doing?

Don’t overthink it.

This brief self-assessment could provide valuable insights into your communication habits and highlight areas for improvement. Strengthening your listening skills can enhance both personal and professional relationships, reduce misunderstandings, and foster more effective interactions. So why not take a few minutes to reflect and see where you stand?

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